The Pillsbury Doughboy’s Weight Loss Secret!

BBD: a novel way to track fitness or hot new boy band?

Poppin’ Fresh, that giggly Pillsbury Doughboy used to be thought of as just a happy, overweight little mascot with skin so fair he couldn’t leave the kitchen without sunscreen. Who could have guessed that 30 years after his famous tummy touch Poppin’ Fresh would inspire the greatest health fad since the Thighmaster. Who knows, if this really takes off it may be even bigger than inversion boots.

Introducing the BBD test. I made it up myself. Recently, while working out with the p90x extreme home fitness program, I would periodically stuff a pencil in my belly button and then record the depth. As I watched my belly button depth shrink from 23mm to 17mm over the course of several weeks, the BBD test was born. Before performing the BBD test at home remove all lint, fuzz, half-eaten Twinkies, and any other foreign objects from the navel as these can cause falsely shallow BBD readings and are generally just plain gross. Known side effects include the fact that that it kind-of tickles and may produce the urge to giggle. Important safety tip: always use the erase end. (You’d be surprised.) BBD may be more accurate for guys since we tend to carry more of our flubber in the spare tire and less in the boo-tay. It is, however, worth a try for anyone!

READ  Type 2 Diabetes - Combined Physical Activity Makes It Easier to Control Blood Sugar

Watch for my paper on “The Relationship between Body Mass Index and BBD: a longitudinal cross-sectional regressional meta-analysis” coming soon to a respected medical journal near you.

(Sorry, but if you are an outie you are out of luck.)

Leave a Reply